Tips For Happiness

Readers of this Post are suggested to read my earlier post '30 Things That Make you Happy'.You can find this post under May 09 archive or under the label My Journey Of life.


Happiness is a state of mind, therefore the real source of happiness lies in the mind, not in external circumstances.

• Surround yourself with others who are happy.
• This shall pass. When bad things happen, and you're having trouble accepting it, think to yourself the same thing the ancients did: "This, too, shall pass." And it will. And you'll survive.
• Follow your passions. If you do what you love to do, especially for a living, you will be extremely happy.
• Realize that you deserve it. Frame you mindset that you deserve happiness.
• Get inspired. Take time to read blogs or books or magazine articles about success stories related to what you want to do. It will get you energized.
• Celebrate small occasions or achievements. When you do something right, when you accomplish something, when you feel like it, reward yourself. Celebrate. Have fun, and pat yourself on the back. Also try and celebrate festivals, birthday’s, anniversaries this will give you happiness for those moments and happy memories to cherish later. That man is richest whose pleasures are cheapest.
• Meditation, exercise and healthy eating habits also helps one to find happiness.
• Jumping for joy is good a exercise.
• Limit your information intake, it will simplify your life.
• Spend quality time with family and loved ones.
• Don’t compare yourself with others. It is difficult, but try it. And realize that you are different, with different strengths.
• Try and be romantic .If you have someone special in your life then try and be romantic.
• Go outdoors. Instead of spending time with TV, internet, video games try and go out and appreciate nature, the beauty of the world around us, and the fun of physical activity.
• Help others. Try and offer your help to others you will find out how tremendously happy this will make you. You might even become addicted. Mark Twain said ‘The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up.’
• There is no cosmetic for beauty like happiness.

Hindu - God and Goddess

Hinduism world’s oldest religion with no specific founder with billions of followers makes it’s the third largest religion of the world. Unlike other religions, Hinduism is a way of life, a Dharma, that is, the law that governs all action. It is a beautiful religion revolving around karma (one's deeds). Hinduism is a conglomerate of diverse beliefs and traditions, in which the prominent themes include:

* Dharma (ethics and duties)
* Samsara (rebirth)
* Karma (right action)
* Moksha (liberation from the cycle of Samsara)

Hinduism believes that there is only one supreme Absolute called "Brahman". However, it does not advocate the worship of any one particular deity. In total, there are 330,000,000 (33 crores or 330 million) of these supernatural beings in various Hindu traditions. Hinduism, such as Vaishnavism and Saivism, teach that occasionally, God comes to Earth as a human being to help humans in their struggle toward enlightenment and salvation (moksha.) Such an incarnation of God is called an avatar (or avatāra.). Gods are called devas (or devatās) and goddesses are called devis. The most fundamental of Hindu deities is the Trinity of Brahma, Vishnu and Shiva - creator, preserver and destroyer respectively. Hindus also worship spirits, trees, animals and even planets. Some main Hindu deities are:

• Brahma - The God of Creation.
• Vishnu - The God of Maintenance (Lord Rama and Lord Krishan are believed to be avatar’s of Vishnu)
• Shiva - The God of Destruction
• Saraswati - Goddess of Wisdom - Consort of Lord Brahma
• Lakshmi - Goddess of Wealth, Consort of Lord Vishnu
• Parvati - Goddess Sakti, Consort of Lord Shiva
• Ganesha - Son of Shiva & Parvati. Lord Who Removes Obstacles
• Muruga - Son of Shiva & Parvati
• Anjaneya also known as Hanuman
• Venkateshwara (Venkateshwer or Venkatachalapathi) is another form of Lord Vishnu who is also very popular as a Hindu deity. He is also known as Balaji or Bithala.

• Goddess Durga, also known as Parvati or Lalitha is the wife (consort) of Lord Shiva and exists in various divine (both friendly and fearful) forms. Two of her fierce but very powerful forms are Durga (goddess beyond reach) and Kali (goddess of destruction). Parvati was called Sati in her previous divine incarnation. The family of Lord Shiva, Parvati and their sons Ganesha and Kartikeya is an ideal example of family unity and love.
• Lord Satyanarayana is another form of Lord Vishnu who is commonly worshipped by Hindus in their homes along with family and friends.
• Kartikeya, the second son of Lord Shiva, and Goddess Parvati is also known as Subramaniam, Skanda, Guha, Shadannana or Sanmukha (because he has six faces). While Ganesh removes all obstacles, Skanda bestows all spiritual powers, particularly the power of knowledge.

Superiority Complex – A Personality Disorder

Readers Of this post are suggested to read my post Recognize your Inferiority complex …Causes, Signs & Ways to Overcome. You can find this post under the label My Journey of Life or July 09 Archive.

In our day to day life as we meet people suffering from Inferiority complex, same there are some of our friends, relatives, colleagues who suffer from superiority complex ‘having a very high opinion of oneself ‘.This is another type of subconscious personality disorder. These poor uplifted souls cannot control their own boasting, tendency to discredit others opinions, intentionally drawing attention of others. You should not mix superiority complex with confidence; some people have developed feelings of confidence in a certain field due to their real strength in it. You may feel very confident about public speaking, for example, if you’ve been practicing it for years; it doesn’t mean you feel superior on account of inner inferiority, it just means that you know and are confident that you’re good at it. Studies have suggested that almost every species having at least one case of Superiority Complex.


The problem with superiority complex is that it’s usually a direct result of an underlying inferiority complex; the subject is suffering from feelings of inferiority and thus compensates those feelings by acting superior. The problem with superiority complex is that although the person is one hundred percent sure he is inferior in some way, he still acts arrogantly. He may refuse to see a doctor for example as he feels superior to the doctor and will thus never get a proper treatment.

Many Presidents, priests, celebrities and distinguished scientists sometimes suffer from Superiority Complex.

Raksha Bandhan - A Hindu festival Of Social Importance

Raksha Bandhan is celebrated by Hindus every year on 'Shravan Purnima' (Full Moon Day of the Hindu month of Shravan), which generally falls in the month of August. A festival to celebrate the bond between a brother and a sister. Hindu religion considers attaches a lot of purity for the relationship of brother and sister. This pious relationship is celebrated in a special manner on the day of Raksha Bandhan. The literal meaning of 'Raksha-Bandhan' is 'the bond of protection. A sister ties a decorative thread called 'Rakhi' on the wrists of her brother symbolizing her love and affection for her brother. This thread, which pulsates with sisterly love and sublime sentiments, is rightly called the ‘Rakhi’. The brother in return vows to protect his sister during all times and also buys his sister attractive gifts.

One of the tales associated with this festival is related from the great Hindu epic Mahabharata. Draupdai the wife of Pandavs had tied the a strip of silk off her sari and tied it around Krishna's wrist to stop the flow of blood Krishna was so touched by her action that he found himself bound to her by love. Krishna repaid the debt of love during Vastra haran of Draupadi. Draupadi's Vastra Haran was done in the assembly of King Dritrashtra, when Yudhishthir her husband lost her in gamble. At that time Krishna provided her with sari (extender her sari) to save her pride. This is how he paid his debt towards Rakhi tied to him by Draupadi. There are many other such tales associated with this festival of Raksha Bandhan.

This festival attaches a lot of social importance in Hindu religion. This festival conveying the love a sister has for her brother and vice versa, the occasion spreads the message of harmonious family ties. At the same time, all responsible individuals should strive to nurture brotherly and sisterly feelings towards each other and live in harmonious coexistence with each other. Not only this festival is celebrated between brother and sister of blood relation but also among the extended family of cousins, friends. In today modern busy world this is the day when far off brother and sister remember each other by sending this holy thread through courier, internet etc.

This year Raksha Bandhan will be celebrated on 5th August. Check out http://juhishandmadecards.blogspot.com/ for some beautiful Raksha Bandhan cards.

Alta or Mahawar – Indian Tradition of Decorating feet

Painting feminine toes in deep red Alta is a tradition of India. Alta is red color dye which is used by Indian women for decorating their feet specially during marriages and religious festivals. Adoration of foot is a glorifying and humble experience. Traditionally an Indian woman devotes as much attention to her feet as she does to her face and hair. Feet are bathed and rubbed with scrubbers to remove ingrained dirt and rough skin. They are massaged with scented oils for pleasure and relaxation as well as to maintain a healthy body. The soles are stained red with henna or mehendi. For special occasions the upper foot is painted with Alta elaborate designs and ornamented with jewellery.

Beauty of Indian bride is incomplete without decorating her feet with Alta. Almost every Bengali woman applies Alta on her feet during Durga puja. The make up kit of a Bengali woman is incomplete without Alta. Traditionally Alta was made from beetles, but now its made from artificial colors.

Alta not only makes the feet look beautiful but also provides a cooling effect which makes the entire body feel fresh and cool. Alta is also known as Mahawar in some parts of the country. The only difference is that Alta is bright red in color whereas Mahawar is dark pink in color. Alta and Mahawar are both used for decorating feet.In the second picture Lord Krishna decorating Radha's feet with Mahawar.

Symbols Of Hinduism

Hinduism employs the art of symbolism with amazing effect. No religion is so replete with symbols as this ancient religion. And all Hindus are touched by this all-pervasive symbolism all through the life in some way or the other. They usually signify Hindu concepts, the attributes of deities, or the gods or goddesses themselves. Some common symbols of Hinduism are :

Om – Also spelled as Aum is Hindu greatest sounds considered the greatest of all mantras. The eternal process of birth, life, death and rebirth, and life incarnate. The Aum is the Universal symbol of Creation. Its four parts represent the four stages of consciousness: Awake, sleeping, dreaming, and the transcendental state. Although Om symbolizes the most profound concepts of Hindu belief, it is in use daily. The Hindus begin their day or any work or a journey by uttering Om. The sacred symbol is often found at the head of letters, at the beginning of examination papers and so on. Many Hindus, as an expression of spiritual perfection, wear the sign of Om as a pendant. This symbol is enshrined in every Hindu temple premise.

Swastika - The next religious symbol which is also revered by Hindu. Hitler's use of the Swastika as a Nazi emblem, on the flag of National-socialist Germany has besmirched the Swastika. But the Swastika continues to hold a religious significance for the Hindus. In Hinduism, the two symbols represent the two forms of the creator god Brahma: facing right it represents the evolution of the universe, facing left it represents the involution of the universe. It is also seen as pointing in all four directions (north, east, south and west) and thus signifies stability and groundedness.

Trihsula –Also spelled as Trishul or trisula. It is usually a Hindu-Buddhist religious symbol.The word means ‘three spears.’ The three prongs of the trishula represent Shiva's three aspects of:
* creator,
* preserver
* destroyer
as well as the three shaktis (powers):
* will
* action
* wisdom
The fearsome goddess Durga also brandishes a trishula in one of her hands.

Lotus - In Hinduism, the lotus (Sanskrit: padma) primarily represents beauty and non-attachment. The lotus is rooted in the mud but floats on the water without becoming wet or muddy. This symbolizes how one should live in the world in order to gain release from rebirth: without attachment to one's surroundings. The lotus is the foremost symbol of beauty, prosperity and fertility. According to Hinduism, within each human inhabiting the earth is the spirit of the sacred lotus. It represents eternity, purity and divinity and is widely used as a symbol of life, fertility, ever-renewing youth and to describe feminine beauty, especially the eyes. Goddess of Wealth ‘Lakshmi’ sits in a Lotus flower and holds blossoms in her hands.

Kalasha, also spelled as Kalash.-It is a metal (copper, silver or gold ) pot with a large base and small mouth. "Kalasha" also refers to such a pot filled with water and topped with a coronet of mango leaves and a coconut. Kalasha is believed to be a symbol of abundance, wisdom, and immortality. Kalasha is not only used for daily prayers by Hindus but also in Griha Pravesha (house warming), child naming, havan (fire-sacrifice). Kalasha represents material things: a container of fertility - the earth and the womb, which nurtures and nourishes life. The mango leaves associated with Kama, the god of love, symbolize the pleasure aspect of fertility. The coconut, a cash crop, represents prosperity and power. The water in the pot represents the life-giving ability of Nature.

Rudraxa - Rudraksha is a tree that can be found at the foothills of the Himalayas; the trees are, according to a legend (Shiva Purana), a product of Lord Shiva's tears. Shaiva rosaries are made from Rudraksha beads. Rudraksha beads are the natural product of Rudraksha trees and are used for many things.

If Marriages are made in heaven, then is Divorce made in Hell ?

To readers of this post,I would recommend to read my earlier posting 'An Institution Of Marriage' and 'How Can Communication Help In Building a Strong Relationship'?.You can find these posts in Archive May 09 or even under the label My Journey Of Life


Divorce, the word that was taboo till sometime back, has today become the easiest solution for people having problems in marital life. Slightest tensions, slightest arguments and married couples are ready to go their separate ways. Divorce or dissolution of marriage is the final termination of a marriage, canceling the legal duties and responsibilities of marriage and dissolving the bonds of matrimony between two persons. Divorce rates are higher in European or American countries, where individual freedom is given higher stress, than in, say, Asian or African ones, where familial and social opinions cause higher stress. With globalization, of course, the developing and under developed countries are catching up. The Common reasons of Divorce are:


• Lack of communication between spouses
• Infidelity
• Abandonment
• Alcohol Addiction
• Substance Abuse
• Physical Abuse
• Sexual Abuse
• Emotional Abuse
• Inability to manage or resolve conflict
• Personality Differences or ‘irreconcilable differences’
• Differences in personal and career goals
• Financial problems
• Different expectations about household tasks
• Different expectations about having or rearing children
• Interference from parents or in-laws
• Lack of maturity
• Intellectual Incompatibility
• Sexual Incompatibility
• Insistence of sticking to traditional roles and not allowing room for personal growth
• Falling out of love
• Religious conversion or religious beliefs
• Cultural and lifestyle differences
• Inability to deal with each other’s petty idiosyncrasies
• Mental Instability or Mental Illness
• Criminal behavior and incarceration for crime
• Nosy Mother in Law (This reason is seen more in eastern countries where the concept of joint family is still prevailing)
• Venereal Disease

There are some reasons where Divorce is unavoidable. But there are lots and lots of reasons that can be sorted out among couples.

• Respect your marriage and work together as a team. Divorce may be the easy way out of frustrating relationship, but staying married is worth the effort.
• It’s well said “When people get married because they think it's a long-time love affair, they'll be divorced very soon, because all love affairs end in disappointment. But marriage is recognition of a spiritual identity.”
• A good marriage is the union of two forgivers. Remember the three "F"s in a successful marriage.
"F"riendship
"F"reedom
"F"orgiveness
You are each others "F"riend, give each other "F"reedom and "F"orgive each other at times.

To conclude, Heaven and Hell are two states of mind. When you marry you become happy feels like heaven and when it comes to divorce then we feel sorrow then it feels like Hell. Just to recall one of my favorite quote here,

“My wife Mary and I have been married for forty-seven years and not once have we had an argument serious enough to consider divorce; murder, yes, but divorce, never.”

The Concept of Arrange Marriage

The concept of arranged marriage may sound impractical to the Western world, but in India, it is a usual norm. No matter how westernized India may have become, arranged marriages are still viewed as the most preferred choice in the Indian families. Love marriage is still considered a taboo in India. Not Only India, in many parts of Asia the concept of Arrange Marriage is practiced. Such marriages had deep roots in royal and aristocratic families around the world, including Europe. Arranged marriages should not be confused with Forced Marriage. Factors which are considered in India in an Arranged Marriage are reputation of the family, Vocation, Wealth, Religion, Caste, Dietary pattern, Language, Horoscope, physical attributes such as height, looks, weight, and age difference and also pre-existing medical conditions.

Modernization Of Arrange Marriages – The traditional arranged marriage has long been an integral part of the Indian culture. In earlier times, there were marriages where bride and groom were not even allowed to see each other before marriages. But with advent of industrialization, arrange marriages are taking a modern outlook. As against love marriage, it is the concept in which the parents and family members search for the prospective bride or the groom, through their acquaintances or advertisements in newspapers and marriage portals. In the earlier times, with everything being fixed by family members, the bride and groom used to be practically clueless about the person they were marrying. Today the arranged marriage system of India has become more flexible.

• Parents or family members select few proposals through marriage websites, matrimonial advertisements, friends, relatives and keep them forward in front of their children. Then, prospective bride or groom has a lot more say as to who they will eventually marry.
• The prospective candidates can get a chance to know each other by telephone, internet and through series of dates before they decide whether they are right for each other.
• Now the period of courtship is longer, where the prospective candidates are given a chance to know more about each other.
• Parents introduce their child to the prospective spouse. Parents of the children may have spoken to the parents of the potential partner as well, but a strict “no interference” policy is observed. It is up to their children to manage the relationship and come to a decision on their own.

To conclude this post I just recall a saying ‘Marriages are made in heaven and consummated on Earth’

Holi The Festival Of Spring - Scientific Importance

India has an age-old tradition of festivals. In India, festivals do not just offer people a temporary reprieve from their daily grind. Imbued with deep inner significance, each festival is a multifaceted celebration. The day on which a particular festival is celebrated has a special astrological significance, and certain observances on these days yield manifold benefits. The festivals play a significant role in adding color and gaiety to the lives of the Indian people. Some festivals are celebrated specially to welcome the full moon, rains, new harvest while others are celebrated for purely religious purposes.
Indian Hindu festivals hold some scientific importance with their religious importance.

Holi, also called the Festival of Colors, is a popular Hindu spring festival observed in India. Holi is celebrated at the end of the winter season on the last full moon day of the lunar month Phalguna (February/March), (Phalgun Purnima), which usually falls in the later part of February or March. It is interesting to note that the festival of Holi is significant for our lives and body in many other ways than providing joy and fun.
We also need to thank our forefathers who started the trend of celebrating Holi at such a scientifically accurate time, also for incorporating so much fun in the festival. In India, spring season, during which the weather changes, is believed to cause viral fever and cold. Thus, the playful throwing of natural colored powders has a medicinal significance: the colors are traditionally made of Neem, Kumkum, Haldi(Tumeric), Bilva, Red Sandlowood powder and other medicinal herbs prescribed by Āyurvedic doctors. Haldi,Red sandlowood & Neem is used to make face packs & many beauty treatments. Traditionally, the dry colors used in Holi were prepared from Tesu or Palash flowers, which are first gathered from the trees, dried in the sun, and then ground up, and later mixed with water to produce orange-yellow coloured water .For wet colours, traditional flowers of Palash are boiled and soaked in water over night to produced yellow colored water, which also had medicinal properties. Tesu colors help in improving the skin complexion, suplness of the skin. Legends say Lords Krishna use to play holi with Tesu flower colors.

There is yet another scientific reason for celebrating the Holi, this however pertains to the tradition of Holika Dahan. The mutation period of winter and spring, induces the growth of bacteria in the atmosphere as well as in the body. When Holika is burnt, temperature rises to about 145 degrees Fahrenhiet. Following the tradition when people perform Parikrima (circumambulation or going around) around the fire, the heat from the fire kills the bacteria in the body thus, cleansing it. During the festival, the season is going through a change - from winter to summer. It is the period when people feel lethargic and drowsy. Holi provides them the opportunity to wear off their laziness, by enjoying themselves thoroughly.

The Attire Of Elegance Sari Continued….. Tanta,Baluchari & Kantha Sarees from the Looms of West Bengal.

This is in continuation of my earlier post 'The Attire Of Elegance Sari'

Formerly “Calcutta”, Kolkata is acknowledged as the cultural capital of India and its friendliest metropolis. It is also home to India's heaviest concentration of political activists, poets and artists. Nestling in rural Bengal, amidst lush green paddy fields, punctuated by picturesque pukurs (ponds) are entire weaver villages engaged in creating the equivalent of poetry on fabric. Triumphing over the trauma of partition, weaver families which migrated to West Bengal in the 50’s have helped keep alive a priceless heritage of highly stylized weaving techniques honed over generations. The handloom industry in the eastern region has had its share of bumpy rides, but Bengal handlooms have survived the ups and downs to become a household name among connoisseurs of textiles.


Tanta/Taant Cotton - The Tant sarees are popular not only among the Bengali women but are liked all over India for their unique appearance and colors. The word literally means ‘Made On The Loom’, Taant is the traditional sari of Bengali women in India. Popularly known as Bengal cotton, taant is hand-woven in various districts of West Bengal. These saris come in a variety of colors with simple yet beautiful designs. Bengali handlooms are known for their transparent and crisp muslin like finish that is a joy to wear on a hot day. The lightness of the body cloth, combined with wide and silky threadwork borders and elaborate pallus with supplementary threadwork ornament give the sari it's unique evenness of drape. If you are a cotton lover then you must have these unique Taant sarees in your wardrobe.

Baluchari Sari: The Baluchari sari of Murshidabad district, West Bengal is made of silk and woven on special looms is approximately 200 years old. The borders and pallu of the sari are very striking because of its use of intricate thread work to depict stories from the Mahabharata and Ramayana. Baluchari Sari is similar in appearance to Benarsi sari but the only difference is that Baluchari sari use only silk thread, they do not use zari thread. The contrasting colors like deep red, pruple, deep blue with motifs of flowers, mythology, traditional Muslim court scenes, pleasure boat on two love birds on top are some of the designs often seen in these traditional Balcuhari sarees. The most distinctive feature of Baluchari sarees is their elaborate borders and pallu sometimes inspired by epics of Bishnupur temple.

Kantha Sari - Kantha is really the name for the embroidery itself, rather than the sari. Any garment or cloth with Kantha embroidery (which forms or outlines decorative motifs with running stitch) is a Kantha garment. Kantha is the specialty of Bolpur/Shantiniketan. The entire cloth is covered with running stitches and usually has beautiful folk motifs, floral motifs, animal and birds figures and geometrical shapes. Except for the straight Kantha stitch, it is customary to represent illustrations from well-known epics such as the Ramayana or Krishna Lila, and also legends evolving from folk-rituals of Bengal Kanthas in Bengal and as Sujanis in Bihar. This art of Kantha is practiced by rural women in West Bengal in spare time and each Kantha sari is the labour of love.

West Bengal is not untouched from the wide range of sarees from Bangladesh like Jamdani, Jamdani Khulna, Dhakai Benarosi and Rajshahi silk.

Recognize your Inferiority complex Causes...Signs & Ways to Overcome

Eleanor Roosevelt said “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”

In our day to day life we come across many friends, people who suffer from Inferiority complex. But actually they are not themselves aware that they suffer from this acute problem. It is often subconscious, and is thought to drive afflicted individuals to overcompensate, resulting either in spectacular achievement or extreme schizotypal behavior, or both. Inferiority complex can also be termed as low self esteem. An inferiority complex, in the fields of psychology and psychoanalysis, is a feeling that one is inferior to others in some way. Those with low self esteem are more likely to be depressed, irritable, or aggressive. They may also be more likely to have feelings of resentment, alienation, and unhappiness. Some reasons for this problem are:

• Family - The upbringing of the child plays a vital role in shaping his future. Sometimes parents unknowingly pass negative remarks on their child by calling them stupid, idot, fool. Also many a time’s parents end up comparing their own children. This family behavior leads to a slow nurturing of Inferiority complex in the delicate mind of the child.
• Surroundings- Being called names like lazy or stupid by teachers and peers. Not being a skilled player in the popular sport of your school might be a reason.
• Physical disabilities –Sometimes disproportional facial and body features also causes Inferiority complex.
• Social Causes – Race, economic status, religion, skin colour, and family might also lead to inferiority complex.

Signs of Inferiority Complex


• People who feel inferior “know” they have shortcomings; they do not like other people to point this out. They tend to perceive any form of criticism, regardless of how sensitively or constructively it is presented, as a personal attack. They are extremely sensitive to criticism.
• Some people are extremely desperate to hear good things about themselves. But some people refuse to hear any positive or flattering things about themselves because it is inconsistent with their own feelings.
• People who suffer from this complex often have the tendency to blame others to lessen their feeling of being inferior.
• Such kinds of people avoid social gatherings and if they are forced then they would avoid speaking thinking that they would end up showing their stupidity and dullness.
• These people are extremely scared of failures. So they avoid any participating in any competition or contest because as per their mindset they are suppose to come first or else they will end up showing their weakness to the world.
• People who do not feel good about themselves have trouble feeling good about anyone else

Ways to Overcome Inferiority Complex

Attempts at achieving and becoming superior will, no doubt, are of great benefit to your life, but it will only act as a fake crust to an already residing inferiority complex. Rather recognize your inferiority complex and work on it by changing your thoughts by changing your negative self talk, building confidence, try and build your corrupted self image & install new beliefs and also get rid of those labels of childhood like stupid, fool.